Meeting all parts of yourself…

Meeting all parts of yourself…

Do you ever notice that sometimes one part of you feels sad and another part feels mad?  

Or, a part of you desires one thing but another part desires something that is completely different? 

If this feels like a yes to you, you are not alone.  

That is because we all have different parts of ourselves that make up our whole self. The variety of internal dialogue can sometimes reflect conflicting internal experiences. And these conflicting experiences can cause tension or be a source of disconnection from our whole & authentic self.  

Parts work therapy is an approach that I love to integrate into my psychotherapy practice and helps to create cohesion and integration of all parts of the self. I work from a Structural Dissociation Theory approach, and I weave in Internal Family System’s concepts as I find it very easy for my clients to grasp.  

Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is a form of psychotherapy that focuses on the internal dynamics of a person’s personality. Developed by Richard Schwartz in the 1980s, IFS is based on the idea that each person has multiple internal “parts” or sub-personalities that can influence their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. 

IFS therapy reflects that our internal parts can be categorized into three groups:

Managers:

Managers are parts that try to control or suppress feelings or behaviors that they perceive as problematic

Firefighters:

Firefighters are parts that react impulsively to intense emotions or threats. 

Exhiles:

Exiles are parts that hold onto painful memories or emotions, and are often isolated or suppressed by the other parts.

“Your protectors’ goals for your life revolve around keeping you away from all that pain, shame, loneliness, and fear, and they use a wide array of tools to meet those goals—achievements, substances, food, entertainment, shopping, sex, obsession with your appearance, caretaking, meditation, money, and so on.”
― Richard C. Schwartz, No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model

The goal of IFS therapy is to help individuals understand and work with these internal parts in a more integrated and compassionate way. Through therapy sessions, individuals learn to identify and differentiate between their various parts, and to develop a sense of trust and compassion for each of them. 

One of the key principles of IFS therapy is the concept of the “Self,” which represents the core of a person’s being and provides a sense of stability and clarity. By accessing and strengthening the Self, individuals can better navigate the various internal parts and achieve greater balance and harmony within themselves. 

IFS therapy has been found to be effective in treating a variety of mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, PTSD, and addiction. The therapy can also be helpful in improving relationships, reducing conflict, and increasing self-esteem. 

Overall, IFS therapy is a powerful and transformative approach to psychotherapy that can help individuals develop greater self-awareness, self-compassion, and emotional resilience.  

A book that I often recommend to clients is No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz. If this blog post sparks interest, reading this book may be a great place to start and learn more.  

If you are struggling with mental health issues or are interested in exploring your internal dynamics, IFS therapy may be worth exploring with a trained therapist.